Monday, January 05, 2009

"In The Life" focuses on former ex-gays

The ex-gay survivor movement, Beyond Ex-Gay and our Ex-Gay Survivor Conference in Irvine, CA are the subjects of a new "In The Life" segment. Wayne Besen, Peterson Toscano, Rev. Dr. Mel White, and Michael Bussee are all interviewed.

"In The Life" is a GLBT news magazine show on PBS stations (think a queer 60 minutes). It was particularly gratifying to see this addressed on "In The Life" mostly because there were different times in my life when that show acted as something of a lifeline for me. When I was ex-gay, I caught the show a few times and remember feeling a sense of connection to something I had lost. I saw the show when I was first coming out of the whole ex-gay mess and watched it hungrily. I was so desperate to see people who looked like me. Now I watch it and realize how content I feel in my life, and I'm happy the show was there for me through the years. Follow the link to view the show!


  1. I cry for all the gay ones who have had to endure this. I will keep doing whatever I can to bring more understanding. Thanks for posting this, Christine.
    (and I hope this makes more sense than the text msg. I sent last night)

  2. Isn't it weird how the mind can kick up and rebel against the boxes we try to place them in?! I forget all about the show now, but it served as a lifeline for me in my late teens and early twenties, too. I'm glad it's still around and stil helping other people. And now there are former ex-gays speaking directly to people in the situation you were in through that show!

  3. Hi Sweetface!
    How HAVE you been?!

    I am touched already by the title of the article before this one "they'll see how beautiful we are..."

    That gets me thinking about the fact that were any of us put into a room, those who oppose gay people wouldn't know how to tell any of us apart.
    If all the children of gay or straight parents were seen running up to school, no one could tell which child had gay parents.

    And therein, I believe is the point.
    Colors, gender...these are easy to isolate.
    But the gay folks require another kind of system of separation.
    Usually obvious singletons are the first to be assumed as gay.
    Especially those who aren't talking about a sex life with their chums.

    Men who hit on women who don't hit back, assume they are gay so that the bruising of rejection can be less painful.
    Men who do the same to a woman not shy about approaching an available man, do the same.

    Not an easy category to get to, but one that's familiar.

    Systematic, institutional unmarried status cements the likelihood of not only being labeled, but pressured to such exhaustion that a trip into matrimony seems preferable than all the nosy questions, and awkward set ups.

    My, my, my...
    Here I sit, a reluctantly single and abandoned former married lady.
    Going through the impossibly frustrating river of barely dating and involuntary celibacy for the last four years.

    I would absolutely go nuts if someone decided I'm better OFF this way because I was gay, and deserved to be so for the same reason.

    On SO many levels, I can and work to empathize with my gay loved ones and those gay folks I don't even know.

    I'm appalled at how little concern there is for the price already paid and what they are demanding.
    It's not THEIR lives, it's not THEIR time, not THEIR dime.
    Yet, the straight folks out there, with a straight face, say...ah..but you can, you must...or else.

    And it's the 'else', so conveniently ignored or not acknowledged that sets even MY teeth on their edges.

    The 'else' is something that just last Nov. folks say they are fighting to keep, and protect folks they feel certain will damage it, or are unfit to be a part of it.

    In spite of all the OTHER Biblical and Christian reprobates who CAN, without challenge.
    And it's THIS subject alone that seems to bring out the amateur Biblical scholar in folks.

    I'm paying attention, Christine.
    To every hyperbolic, if not hypocritical exposition on who is fit and deserves to be here.

    In Biblical times, gay folks were easy human sacrifices to make.
    And even though the government doesn't condone formal violence against gay people anymore, the OTHER forms of human sacrifice are firmly in play.

    "What does it profit a man...?"
    Indeed, that can be said for the gay person who tries and tries to fulfill the expectations of all but themselves.

    And I would ask the question, so why SHOULDN'T a gay person fulfill their own expectations for a happy life?
    Who can judge what makes a gay person happy, if they aren't allowed the means that make MOST decent human beings happy?

    I'm glad you're here on the journey. I respect you and certainly feel that you and I, straight lady ally and lesbian advocate are strong together, and we know who we are.

    We know where we belong and why.
    Be well Sweetface, I hope to talk to you soon.

    Love, Regan

    P.S. Hi Carol! How are you?

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