What a week!

This has been a fantastic but busy week. It is so exciting to see the fruition of a dream. Beyondexgay.com has been generating great feedback, and a lot of people are excited about it, and about the upcoming Ex-Gay Survivor's Conference.

I have ducked out of the house once or twice this week, but beyond that I've had my fingers glued to the keyboard, working on the design of the site, replying to e-mails. Good thing I don't have paying work this week (and no, you'll not hear me saying that very often—We'll see how I feel about it in June when I need money).

In a somewhat random aside, inflation has caught up with my local dollar theater. It is now the dollar-and-a-quarter theater, which doesn't quite have the same ring to it. After we launched the site on Monday, I finally went to sleep for a few hours. Then I went to my dollar theater (imagine my shock and dismay having to hand over that extra quarter) and saw "The Pursuit of Happyness" which was a great movie to see that day. Someone pursuing a dream, and with a happy ending.

My dream, of course, is to have an alternative to the messages from Exodus, to see people heal from their ex-gay experiences, and to deter people from experiencing something that is often emotionally and spiritually harmful. I know it's been Peterson's dream since well before I was even ex-ex-gay, but it's wonderful to have a partner in this, and to see it starting to become a reality. Documentaries are being made, books are being published, people are telling their stories. It's a new day for us.

We just added a wonderful narrative from Darlene Bogle, a former Exodus ministry leader. She has just published a new book called A Christian Lesbian Journey: A Continuation of Long Road to Love. She wrote two pro-ex-gay books while she was involved in the ex-gay world, one of them being The Long Road to Love, which explains the subtitle of her new book. I'm very glad to have her narrative on our site.

In other news, I have had the duct-tape ripped off my mouth (or fingers) and I can finally talk about being interviewed for a Glamour magazine story.

And one of the things that means is I that I can also finally blog about whatever the heck I want. I agreed to a bit of a blogging restriction about certain topics and anecdotes when I first agreed to do the story (2 weeks after I started this blog), but had no idea it would end up being for a year-and-a-half! I understand why they do it, but maybe now I will be able to blog more regularly. Or maybe I am just making excuses for my lack of previous blogging, and blaming the restrictions when it's really just that I didn't get around to blogging. I'm, um, not saying that's something I would do, or anything...

So, April 9th you can see the article at Glamour.com, and April 10th it will be available at newsstands (it's the May issue). I'll write more about the interview and the whole process soon.

Oh, I almost forgot. I'm going to be on "OutQ in the Morning with Larry Flick" show tomorrow morning on the OutQ Sirius Satellite radio channel (channel 109). I should be on for a few minutes around 7:30ish Eastern time if you want to listen in.

The BIG super HUGE news!!!

Today is a BIG day in the ex-ex-gay world.

Peterson and I have been working for over a year on a website called "Beyond Ex-Gay" and today is the official launch!

In addition, we're also announcing an ex-gay survivors conference, called "The Survivor's Conference: Beyond Ex-Gay" that we're doing in partnership with Soulforce and also the UC-Irvine LGBT resources center.

It'll be June 29th through July 1st and I've heard the workshop leaders will be fantastic! ;) There's info on our site, and also Peterson has just blogged about it.

We could not have done it without Steve Boese (from A Tenable Belief), my friend Joel Bass, and others who have contributed artwork, narratives, video, etc.

So check out the site and let us know what you think!

I'm going to bed...been a long night. But so worth it. :D

The gift of family traditions

I just got back from Texas, where I helped celebrate my nephew's second birthday. As you can see, he is already a stellar reader. (And you can see his poor hands are swollen, though much better then when I got there, from being bitten by a horde of fire ants. He would hold them out for me and say "Owwies, Teen!"—his pronunciation of my name. Gotta love Texas!)

We visited a nearby lake one overcast day. The boys (2 and 4) flew a kite with the help of their dad. Later, my sister and I broke into the "Let's Go Fly a Kite" song from Mary Poppins. As a family, whenever we flew a kite, we always ended up singing that song at some point. My sister and I grew up with virtually no television (and what we did see was tightly controlled), but we were allowed to watch a lot of classic musicals, and it wasn't uncommon for my mom to burst into a song appropriate to different occasions, many from these movies.

One of the first things my sister and I did when we got to the water's edge was look for shells. We just both naturally bent over and started looking and comparing. Soon the boys, bored with the inactivity involved in kite flying, came over to join us and started looking, too.


We are carrying on a tradition that also came from our mom and dad (well, mostly our mom). Both our parents are beach lovers, and we spent many good and fun times camping near the beach or just going for day visits (we always lived no more than two hours away from the Pacific ocean the whole time we were kids, and it's one of the things I miss the most being out here in a land-locked state). Just like my nephews, my sister and I got in the act of looking for shells or bits of polished glass when we were just toddlers, and it's something we naturally continue and enjoy today.

It was fun for both of us to relive these good memories of family time, and think about the gifts our parents have given us. Traditions that we continue today, and things that we are passing on to our parent's grandchildren.

When I come visit I usually have books stowed away in my suitcase that I bring out every night. (One night, while J. was trying to pick a book to read for that evening, he said, "Let's just get one more out of your suitcase, Auntie Christine!" even though I hadn't told him there were more where those others came from.) My sister and brother-in-law read to the kids before naps and before bedtime, just like my mom used to read to us when we were young (when I was perhaps five, I surprised my grandmother by "reading" her a whole book that I'd actually just memorized).

I just hope that the youngest hasn't inherited my (lack of) fashion sense (another inherited gift from my dad). I remember once my mom coming up with a complicated system of matching clothes that had number or letter combinations on the hangers so my dad could dress in clothes and ties that matched. Here is E. in a pajama top, diapers, and rain boots right before bedtime (he is also peaking at his birthday presents).

Here is the family having some fun in the backyard with the bubble machine and various toys. When I was a kid, we'd go to parks after church (we lived a ways from our church, so would spend the day at a park between the morning and evening service). Sometimes we played lawn darts or other games after our picnic. It is nice to think about those times and know that my boys are having the same kind of experiences with parents who care that they have fun outside.

Enjoy your childhood, boys. And thanks, mom and dad.

A long un-Christmas season

If you think this blog has been neglected, you should see my house! I still have the un-Christmas tree up, complete with ornaments, and the cats' Christmas stockings are still hung by the chimney with care (no, I'm not kidding). It's so sad to see the look on their little faces every morning when they hope I'll pull another toy out of those magic socks for them...

Alas, un-Christmas only comes once a year, even if my house tells you otherwise.

But I'll be back very soon, and with a huge announcement.

Hello Pastor!

I needed a good laugh today and this audio from Ship of Fools provided more than one:

Hello pastor

Make sure you keep listening to the very end.

(The kinda scary thing is that this probably is not a one-time thing for pastors. If you have a pastor, make sure they know you appreciate them.)

Spirituality and the queer community

Yesterday I had the priviledge of speaking in a college class about my journey and the intersection of sexuality and faith. I'm part of a speaker's bureau at three colleges that share a campus here in Denver, so occasionally I get called and asked to be a part of a panel of speakers. Usually we try to have a representation of all of the letters in GLBT (so far they haven't been able to get a Q or an I - if Q stands for questioning). I'm obviously the L in the alphabet soup.

Even though I usually end up having to decline paid work in order to do these panels and presentations, it always feels worth it to me when it's over. There is usually a lot of diversity in our stories, which is interesting for me to hear, and good for the students. Telling our stories is one of the most powerful things we can do to bring about a change in beliefs or attitudes. Yesterday I presented with a woman who grew up in the Catholic church and is now a bi Pagan. It was interesting to see where our stories diverged (often wildly) and where they overlapped. I presented my story of growing up in a fundamentalist, pentecostal family, my coming out, my ex-gay experiences (which always fascinates the students), and my eventual re-coming out (which Peterson describes as actually coming to his senses, and that resonates with me).

One of the things I always try to talk about is my hope that in the future, queer folks will be able to reconcile their spirituality (whatever that looks like for them) with their sexuality. When I first came out, I was so angry with the church. I felt like I was a sinner (even though I hadn't done anything), and I didn't know what to do with all of it. I knew I couldn't hide anymore, and I couldn't pretend that I wasn't gay. I cut off this huge piece of myself in order to not have to deal with all the emotions and the hurt and anger. The problem is that our spirituality is not some little separate part of ourselves. It weaves in and out of all the other stuff, and informs our values, our sense of ourselves and our view on the world and others.

One student asked why she sees some of her friends who finally come out get right into alcohol or drugs or promiscuity. I think there are many factors to that. I mentioned the overwhelming experiences in coming out, that many people don't know how to deal with emotionally. They do a lot to run from pain. I mentioned that there was a point for me where I thought "well, if everyone thinks I am so horrible, and sinning by doing nothing but being attracted to women, then I might as well do whatever I want--It's not like anyone could think worse of me at this point." But I think maybe one of the biggest contributors is a sense of not being welcome anywhere else and not having a connection to the spirituality or the God they may have grown up with. I think perhaps we don't realize how much of ourselves we disown when we are disowned by the Church, and how in our hurt and anger we lose something that is an important part of ourselves.

It's one of the reasons, I suppose, that I so heavily promote gaychristian.net, and why I am still so involved there. I think the queer community would be a healthier community if people would be able to find their way back to their faith traditions, or at least connect with the spirit inside them. I think things are slowly heading in that direction, though, and it gives me a lot of hope for the future.

Friendship, love and acceptance

It's a weird thing to call up a friend and he says, "Sorry, I can only talk for about four minutes because I'm about to go on national television here in a sec." Um. OK. I'm such an underachiever. I was still in my pajamas, watching a movie. But I'm glad for the opportunities that he and others have had recently to tell their stories of time in the ex-gay movement.

In other news, I just got back from a trip to California to visit some folks who have been a bit of surrogate family to me on and off throughout the years. I first lived with Joe and Cheryl (and their baby boy) for 6 weeks when I had just turned 17 and we had been in frequent contact until I moved to Santa Cruz. But even after that I would stop by their retail store whenever I went home for a weekend.

However, we've not been in touch since I moved to Denver in 1998 to start my ex-gay life. When I moved here, I consciously made a choice to leave everything behind. I only had two friends that knew how to get in touch with me, and one of them (my best friend) didn't even know I'd moved here to become ex-gay. Everyone else was told that I'd e-mail them with contact info when I arrived, but I never did.

In 2003-ish, Cheryl sent me two e-mails and I never responded. She ended up being a casualty of my confusion about being ex-gay and struggling with my faith. I didn't want to talk to anyone who was a Christian, and I didn't want her to be disappointed in me, since she was one of the few people who knew why I moved here.

Fast forward to the end of this year when she found out I had a blog and sent me an e-mail. We've been talking ever since and I decided that I needed to see them in person.

The tricky thing about our relationship is that she's a Christian and believes that homosexual behavior is a sin. I obviously don't. She's a very strong and outspoken Christian and I am not a Christian in the way that most Christians are (I am not sure how to explain this and was asked in a response to another post; and will attempt some sort of explanation soon). She thinks I'm wrong about some things that are very important to me, and I think she's wrong about stuff that is very important to her.

However, she is also one of the most loving and accepting people I have ever met in my life, hands down. She will talk to anyone and everyone and make them feel like they are the most important person right at that moment. She gives with one of the biggest hearts I've ever seen.

But it's still hard to navigate this. I want to be loved unconditionally, and I want to be able to give unconditional love. It is hard to have someone think I am wrong. To talk about my life and feel like they are disapproving. But I have my own disagreements with some of her core beliefs and sometimes our conversations end up being along the lines of "I know you don't agree with this, but..." and the other one saying, "You're right, I don't agree with that."

Some people in tricky relationships like these declare certain topics off-limits. The problem though is what you do when the topics are such a large part of who you are. Sometimes it just seems too hard to figure out. Other times it seems fine. But I don't want her to leave out some of her life, and I won't leave out mine anymore (been there, done that, not interested in going back there).

The trip, though, was great and we had a ton of fun (went to the city one day and hung out on the Haight, did the fisherman's wharf thing and the ocean). It was also a bit emotionally draining for all of us. It's a lot to try to figure out and we definitely had more than one tense conversation. But we also had a lot of fun and good times, a lot of closeness, hugs, and time in the hot tub (oh, and In 'N' Out burger too!)

Anyway, if anyone has any helpful thoughts or tips on navigating this, I'd appreciate it. It's a relationship that means the world to me, and I want to be as respectful, accepting and loving as I possibly can, and yet I don't want to ever be in the position of censoring or defending myself again.

Holding both truths

I wrote this at gaychristian.net today, but thought I'd cross-post it here. It's probably stuff I've covered on my blog before, but it deserves a repeat. The post I was responding to was saying that people were very negative about ex-gay ministries and this person felt censored in attempting to report their positive experience with ex-gay ministries. My response:

I believe that I have posted elsewhere that I did receive some benefit from ex-gay therapy. I worked through some important issues, and reconciled my own sense of myself and my femininity. I am very happy for those things, but overall my ex-gay experiences left me very damaged. I am still working through all the pain from those years and the aftermath. But I have no problem saying that there were good things that did come out of it.

I have even posted about and defended (elseweb) the ministry in Denver I used to attend. In fact, I still consider myself friends with one of the staff and have had some wonderful, open discussion with the ministry founder (who incidentally told me about an affirming congregation I could attend if I were so inclined - not the typical image people think of when they think of an ex-gay leader).

Recently I had the priviledge of meeting someone who had been a very influential person in my decision to do the ex-gay thing. I hold no ill will, and in fact was thrilled to meet her. She is someone that I deeply respect and admire, even though we disagree on some things.

I've never felt censored in saying these things on GCN, but perhaps the difference is that I do talk about the damaging effects, and honestly would never recommend someone go to one of these ministries. I will tell people, if you feel like you fit the ex-gay profile (i.e., have issues in your life that you feel might contribute to you being gay, or just issues you feel you need to resolve - child abuse, sexual addiction, not feeling comfortable with yourself, etc), by all means seek out therapy with a qualified counselor.

For me, I was glad that I resolved these issues, and I am definitely a very different person than the one who moved to Denver in 1998 to become ex-gay. But if I had to do it over (knowing what I know now), I would have gone about it much differently.

Oh, and by the way, after all these many years of therapy, different groups and programs and classes, as well as much prayer and praise and worship, exorcisms, and helping friends and pastors (along with a fervent desire to be pleasing to God and submit myself to his will and allow deep healing work), I am much more well-adjusted and happy in my own skin, but still gay.

Quickly...

I'm not dead. I've just been working on a work project that's keeping me really busy (not that I am complaining about the work, mind you). I just surfaced for a few minutes to update this since a few people had expressed concern.

A big highlight for me in the past few weeks is a concert I attended Friday night with a friend who flew in just to go with me...

I found a link with some info for the show a few nights before...but this'll give you an idea of what it was. Lyle Lovett (the Godhead in my music trinity), John Hiatt, Joe Ely and Guy Clark on a stage together just playing guitars and singing. And I had fourth row seats, sitting about 20 feet away from Lyle Lovett (close enough to see his feet tapping when the other guys were singing, and every expression on his face). It was absolutely amazing, and I don't think I can ever go to another concert because it won't ever be as good as this.

Back to work. Will do a Real Update™ as soon as I can.

One of the only things I know for sure

I got another e-mail yesterday.

I get these every so often. E-mails from old friends that I used to go to church with. Friends of the family who see my e-mail address on someone's group e-mails. People who know I moved to Denver to do the ex-gay thing but lost touch several years ago.

And they want to know what's going on with me. They tell me about their family and kids (kids whose diapers I've changed and they're now in college). They give me MySpace names. They tell me about their churches and ministries. They ask about my life.

What do I say?

A while back, I was driving down the road and happened to see an old friend, Tim, out working in his backyard.

Tim and his family were more than just friends to me. This was a family that in many ways adopted me when I was making the transition from gay to ex-gay and then, hopefully, to straight. They prayed many hours for me. They held me while I cried. They took me into their home on many occasions when I needed a place to just be. I spent holidays with them.

Oddly enough, we'd met at the first church I'd attended here in Colorado. Then I left and started at another one, two doors from their front door. After they were asked to leave our former church, they ended up at my church. I subsequently moved on to another church (although not because I was trying to get rid of them, which we always joked about). Our relationship survived all these church moves and upheaval, including a period of time where I was still friends with the pastors of the former church and each family was so hurt by the other that I couldn't mention the others' names.

Our relationship didn't survive me no longer being an ex-gay or no longer going to church or identifying as a Christian, though.

Not that they shunned me. I saw them about a year or so after I'd told them that I was finally for sure done with the ex-gay thing. I saw them at the funeral of Tim's sister and they were so happy to see me, and comforted, I think, by the fact that I'd come. I knew they cared about me deeply.

And I knew then, a year ago, and I know now that they still care about me. But it's with a broken heart. It's with a burden for my salvation. It's with a sense that I've failed, or perhaps they've failed me.

So when I drove down the road and caught Tim out of the corner of my eye, I flipped a U-turn, and stopped at the house. We spent about an hour sitting in the shade of the backyard, just catching each other up on our lives. I was matter-of-fact about mine. I'd just come from being on a panel at a community college on human sexuality, and I talked about that a bit. I talked about my blog. I talked about my cats.

It was nice, just catching up and hearing what the whole family had been up to. I got to see their daughter who was like a younger sister to me. (I used to say that she thought the sun rose and set in my backyard. And for a few years for her, I think it did. And I liked that.) It turns out she is going to intern at Ted Haggard's former church after graduation (this was before the Ted Haggard debacle, although I suppose that hasn't changed her plans). I wasn't entirely sure what to say about that, but encouraged her in her future plans all the same.

As I was leaving, I said to Tim, "It's hard when everyone thinks I'm a failure. That I've failed."

He nodded somberly.

"But I didn't fail," I said, quietly. "I'm not a failure."

He nodded his head, I think, and gave me a hug. But he didn't deny that people (our formerly mutual friends and church family) think I'm a failure. He is not one to lie, and I appreciate that about him.

So, back to the e-mail of yesterday. These are friends of the family. Missionaries. YWAM folks. People who had reached out to me during a very troubled time in my early 20s, and again when I was making the move to Denver to be ex-gay. I wrote them, "I can't remember when the last time was that we corresponded - I suspect a long time ago. I probably still identified as ex-gay then. I can't remember. Anyway, I don't anymore. I'm gay, end of story. Never changed; can't imagine I ever will. Just thought I'd put that out there since so many people wonder and are not sure how to broach the topic."

I want people to know about my life, and I certainly want to be honest and out, and I know they want to ask (and I don't want to go several e-mails with them fishing for the information). I would rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not. The problem though with this crowd, is not so much being hated, but of them being so saddened over my life, and so filled with grief about where I am now in my journey.

But I don't feel like being a project or participating in this game where I can never be on a level playing field with them. I don't want everyone to learn their life lessons about "Loving the Homosexual" with me. I did enough of that when I was ex-gay and constantly having to teach people in churches what that meant, and didn't, and how they could help me (or more to the point, how what they were doing was in fact not helping, but hurting).

I'm done. And yet, these are people I care (cared?) about. And I know in most cases the feeling is mutual. And I am not sure how to have relationships with these folks and have it be anything mutually fulfilling. Are there many evangelical/fundamentalist Christians out there that even know how to have a relationship with a former Christian without feeling superior or like there is a soul in need of rescuing? I know two or three but that about it, and it is so hard to always hope.

Anyway, at this point, all I really know for sure is that I'm not a failure.

And I'll put off checking my e-mail again until tomorrow.

The Truth about Exodus and Youth

Yesterday Peterson posted about Exodus and their affiliated ministres that work with youth. He writes:

On June 26, 2006 I initially left voice messages for Alan Chambers of Exodus International and another national ex-gay leader about inappropriate incidents that affected youth at an Exodus member ministry. I will not go into the details at this time, but I shared three specific situations that happened within the previous year. The shocking details of the third situation compelled me to contact Alan and this other national leader. In my initial messages I said that I would rather discuss this privately, but if they did not wish to talk, then I would initiate a public discussion.

He detailed how he's been in conversation with Alan Chambers of Exodus about putting into place ministry guidelines that protect youth. While Alan originally seemed to be on board with policy changes and new requirements, he did not make good on his word to Peterson. Peterson continues:

Alan said that the new requirements for Exodus member ministries will go into effect in at the beginning of 2007 and will be done in a public way. I pressed Alan to consider putting them into effect sooner, but he said that he had to meet with the board about it all first.
[snip]
I since followed up with Alan and his assistant through an e-mail containing the draft of this blog entry. I have gotten no further response and as far as I know, and I have seen no evidence of new guidelines being published.

Peterson has followed up with some clarification about the incidents that took place, as well as his Quaker views and how they inform his handling of this entire situation and his dialog with Exodus. He ends with this:

Alan has the power to keep young people from being harmed under his watch. He shared that he will bring forth new guidelines that will protect youth. I believe these should minimally include:

1. Complete separation of youth and adult participants at all Exodus member programs and Exodus sponsored events.
2. Full background checks for all staff working with youth.
3. No youth should be enrolled in a program against his or her will.

If nothing else it this just good business and lowers their liability, but much more importantly it shows a genuine love and respect for these young people.

Indeed. Exodus constantly claims that it acts out of love, and that it believes in self-determination (I guess unless you're under 18 or are being pressured by your parents because you're an adult but they hold the purse strings).

There has since appeared a post on Ex-gay Watch entitled "Who is Telling the Truth about Misconduct in the Exodus Programs?". My money would be on Peterson. Who has the history of truth-telling and who has the history of obfuscation and deliberate mistruths?

A very white Christmas

Realized I should blog a couple of pics from the great blizzard of ought six in Colorado. Where I lived we got two feet in less than 24 hours, the 7th biggest blizzard in Colorado.

This is from my upstairs window...I kept watching my truck getting more buried by the hour.

Snow accumulating in the backyard. I can't get out this way because the gate opens out and has tons of snow on the other side.

The blizzard started on Wednesday. This is me on Thursday afternoon trying to figure out how to get out of the house to shovel. I think my hat was falling off - I am not sure my head is that tall and pointy. Fortunately, I've never replaced the screen in the front screen door.

Not everyone in Denver was so lucky as to have their very own SUV island on their street. There were abandoned cars all over the city, and many on my street. This one was abandoned right in the middle of the road, and the owners didn't come get it (or maybe the city moved it) until Saturday night. So the plows just went around it and so did all the drivers.

The backyard today.

>^..^<

Well, being that it's the end of the year and all, I feel like I should write something profound. It's been an interesting year and sometimes things just don't always go the way you want. That's probably all I have to say about that. (='.'=)

I'm going to now illustrate this with a photo set of Max and Sophie (I'm thinking of turning this into a flip-book).

Stay in line

Hmmm...I'm pretty happy that 2006 is almost over. Happy New Year to all of you. It seems that many people I know are looking forward to a new year.

I have a splitting headache but had to interrupt feeling sorry for myself so that I could post this.

I bought this sign a few days ago as a Christmas present to myself:

Seriously, how could I pass that up?

You don't think I'm weird, do you?

So...it appears that I have been tagged for this "6 weird things about you" questionnaire that is going 'round the net. Well, at least around in my circles. Around in circles. Around circles. Round circles. Hmmm. Anyway.

Sorry my answers are long. That's, like, a weird thing about me. How much I write, when a shorter answer would easily suffice. Consider it a freebie. However, on to the real list:

1. I have food allergies, regular allergies, car sickness, claustrophobia...etc. So a dinner out with me means no Asian food and picking through the menu (and asking lots of questions or making special requests), I have to sit in the front seat of the car, I have to sit on the outside of the booth...and so on. I'm like that kid at camp who always had to be in the nurse station and came with an enormous shoebox full of pills. That's pretty much me.

2. I think that my cats are Jewish (God's way of trying to get folks of different religions, or different flavors of Christianity to get along). I also think they are nearly human, and understand what I say to them.

3. I often anthropomorphize inanimate objects. So if something falls down, I sometimes feel sorry for it. I also think my truck has feelings. Sometimes I don't want to get rid of something because I don't want to hurt its feelings (you know, like that old vase I am giving to goodwill - I don't want it to feel hurt because I've replaced it).

4. Sometimes I think I have a hearing problem (but I really don't - I can hear just fine, especially when I don't want to). I am so visually oriented that I find it hard to listen to audio books and I always watch movies with subtitles or closed-captioning on. When someone tells me something, I often have to see the words spelled out in my head. I often look at people's mouths when they talk, and if I am not looking at their mouth, or not looking at them directly, I occasionally seem to not be able to hear them, or catch words. Sometimes when I hear people talking, I think they aren't speaking in English. But they are. But then again, sometimes when I accidently switch to the Spanish channel (I suck at foreign languages, so I don't know Spanish), I will listen to it for a minute, and not realize it is not English. I think that's pretty weird, don't you?

5. I have a serious problem remembering my right from my left, and often will think "I pledge allegiance to the flag" so that I can think which hand is my right hand (no, that "L" shape hand thing doesn't work for me; because if you have a problem with right and left, why the heck would you remember off the top of your head which way the "L" is supposed to go?). So when I give you directions, if I say left, I might really mean right. But sometimes I might say left and really mean left, right?

6. Sometimes I can't sleep at night because I will start thinking about words that shouldn't go together, or words that do go together, but individually don't make sense, or seem strange, or words that seem spelled wrong, or alliterative words, or weird questions that suddenly bother me, or big long run-on sentences that I create in my head just like this one. Also I envision long sentences with lots of big words, or a string of small words (and lots of parenthetical statements).

So, that's pretty much it. I'm weird. But so are you, probably (although I bet you don't say the beginning of the pledge of allegiance to yourself when you are giving someone directions).

I'm not going to tag anyone...because...everyone I know is pretty much doing this (or has done it). But if you've not been tagged and would like to tag yourself...go for it.