Saturday, April 29, 2006

Calm in the storm

I have this crazy knack for going hyper-calm when something really upsetting happens.

Today my purse, checkbook, wallet, money, cell phone, etc. were stolen out of my truck while I was helping a friend move (hey, it's what good Lesbians do).

Yeah, it's a bummer, and I'm kinda stressed, I suppose. The thieves apparently spent more with my credit cards in 2 hours than I've spent in one year. I have no cell phone now. I have nobody's numbers (which reminds me, if I know you, and I regularly call or text you from my cell phone, please e-mail me your number. The SIM card does no good if it's stolen with the phone, now does it?). No driver's license. My social security card happened to also be in my wallet (that's a big no-no, by the way). I had to cancel my checking account, which means I have to order new checks.

The biggest thing I'm trying to figure out is how do I establish my identity at the DMV to get my driver's license replaced? I don't have a copy of my birth certificate (which is actually the reason I had my social security card in my wallet...I was going to have this form notarized to validate my identity so I could get my birth certificate so that I could get a passport). I guess the DMV has my picture and signature on file. But somehow I have this feeling they don't just let people walk in with nothing to identify themselves and walk out with a valid driver's license.

And since I'm flying in about a week, how do I board a plane without valid picture ID? It's weird to think how much we rely on this stuff now, in our society.

I don't even have any cash right now and no means to get any. I guess I'll get a new bank card in a week or so. And I have a paycheck coming in the mail tomorrow. Of course, I don't think I can cash it without ID? It becomes kind of a catch-22.

I'm sure it will all work out, though. In fact, I went and had lunch with the folks I was doing the moving with, even though I'd noticed my purse missing a bit earlier and we'd determined it wasn't anywhere and had probably been stolen. OK, so maybe that wasn't the best thing - I should have been making those stolen credit card calls. I just figured I'd have time. So maybe the calm thing goes a bit too far.

I mean, I get more upset when someone in front of me slams on their brakes for no reason than I do when someone steals my purse! It occurs to me that maybe this is something I get from my Dad. My dad would drop a screwdriver on the floor and be hopping mad about it. He'd be full of "Oh, for pete's sake" and "Oh for dumb!" (a wonderful midwestern expression). But something major? He just gets pretty quiet and eerily calm. His mind gets analytical and he figures out what to do next.

When I was 17 I got in my first car accident, and it was completely my fault. So I go back home, and I say, "Um....Dad? Do we have good car insurance?" (ha.) He calls up the woman whose car I hit, and he says, "Hi, my name is _____. I understand you had the pleasure of meeting my daughter tonight in the Safeway parking lot."

He didn't yell at me. He didn't get upset. He told me I was going to pay every penny and we didn't report it to insurance. He made me pay for the repair of the other car, and that was that.

I love that about my Dad, and I'm really glad that I've gotten a bit of that from him.

Oh, and send me your number if you think I should have it. Email address is on my profile.

P.S. If you're wondering what this has to do with me being ex-gay, here's the connection(s):

1. I DO Exist! Even if I don't have picture ID, passport, birth certificate, Driver's License, credit cards, or cash. I'm going to make a video about it.

2. If it weren't for Exodus and my time as an ex-gay, I wouldn't even have had my stuff in a purse in the first place! All of this stuff would have been in a wallet in my back pocket where it belongs.

(yes, I'm joking...) :D


  1. I was just wondering that. Why isn't your wallet in your pocket?

  2. I got mugged at gunpoint in front of our place last fall. It was surreal in that I did and still do feel pretty safe in the neighborhood.

    Luckily, being home, I got the ATM card cancelled immediately, and the cops gave me a card with my case that would supposedly help at the DMV.

    Once I found the person who knew which end was up at the DMV, they said that showing up with the face that matched the picture in the system was enough -- they didn't even re-take it.

    O'course, that was AFTER meeting up with a customer service person who didn't know that, and sent me home to dig up a utility bill as proof of my address for more documentation. Oh well...

    So sorry to hear though... good look getting things straightened out!

  3. Hey Dawn, I know. Too funny. I'm such a girl! ;)

    Thanks, Steve, that's helpful. I'll bring a utility bill with me when I go to the DMV, just in case. The trick is always finding the person that knows "which end is up" isn't it? I'm sorry to hear you got mugged that way, though. Sounds scary!

    Once I was sort attempted mugged at an ATM machine when I was about 17. The guy started out asking if I had any spare change, and I said, "No, I only have large bills on me."

    I ended up driving off with my parking break on and him still hanging on to my driver's side door. He finally let go at some point, which was a good thing.


  4. Oh man. What a sucky thing to have had happen. I hope you can get through this without too much hassle.

  5. That SUCKS!!!

    Stop being a good little ex-gay and start carrying your wallet in your back pocket again like the rest of us!

    good luck!

  6. Damn, that's terrible! You're handling it better than I would. I'd get The Rage....which consists of a lot of creative cussing and yelling.

    And I use a wallet (and carry my lipstick and powder in my pocket). People find this amusing. However, just because I'm straight doesn't mean I shouldn't get a Cool Lesbionic Point for using a wallet, right?

  7. Ha, Sheil, like when we were in San Francisco that time pushing my dead car off of 19th Ave UP Ocean street and you're flipping out about needing to get home because you have to wash your hair? Ha. I love that story. And I was pretty calm, then, too wasn't I? You...on the other hand...with your hair being such a pressing concern that I finally offered to put you on a bus so you could go wash it. ;) OK, I couldn't resist bringing that up. Ha. I love it. I am so glad we've connected again. (For everyone reading, Sheila is like a super good friend of mine, since 1991? that I haven't been in contact with since 1997 when I moved to Denver to de-gay; we've reconnected in the last week.)

    But wow, I didn't realize how much of a girly-girl I really am! So I suppose Exodus can be right on this one -- "change is possible" -- they're just not saying what that change is. You could go from Dyke with your wallet in your back pocket to Dyke with a purse. Oy.

    Thanks everyone for the stories, condolences and best wishes!

    I'm just a bit bummed I don't have that camera phone more blog pictures I guess.

  8. Yup, The Hair Meltdown. Thanks for bringing that up in front of everyone here, Chuckles! ;-) Hardy har har. Not sure what in the hell I was thinking there. Maybe I was inhaling too many fumes from passing cars. Yeah, that must be it. I'm sticking to that story.

    And yes, you were very calm. But, that's because you didn't need to WASH YOUR HAIR!!!

    And if you're Dyke with a purse then I can be Straighty with a wallet. (Is there an Exodus pamphlet somewhere that states the direct correlation between "dating people that have boobies" and "using wallets"? I laugh at that pamphlet! Ha HA! <--- me, laughing.)

    Now if you'll excuse me, there's a shampoo bottle with my name written all over it....

  9. Sorry to hear of your misfortune.

    I hope that your replacement cards turn up without a hitch.

  10. OMG! That's so sad, terrible, and funny at the same time!

    So, when it boils down to everything, it's really the fault of Exodus for your purse getting stolen because under normal circumstances you would have had a wallet. Sweet!

    Hope your situation resolves quickly.